@feline99, I love you very much, as a brother in Christ. I want you to remember that somebody loves you and cares about you, even though I'm just a member on a forum.

I have felt many times what you have felt: "is this right, is this wrong? This feels right, so right, in fact, that nothing about it feels sinful. Therefore, I should do it!"

Then I feel horrible after doing it.

The key, I find, to overcoming this battle is to think this before you start to do it: "Am I going to feel bad about this AGAIN? Am I going to make myself miserable and depressed AGAIN?" (Talk to yourself like you are your own body's owner and controller!) "I have done this before, and I am depressed after doing it almost every time. Should I really do this again and make myself feel horrible?"

I'm so proud of you, that you decided to type on this forum about your struggle. That is one of the best things you can do! Prayer is very powerful, but it is not the only thing God requires us to do. God requires each person to do different, separate things, so that the person's path in life may be enhanced. I believe that God directed you to type on this forum so that you can know how much you are cared for by me and by others here.

I pray that God will bless you abundantly, and that you will let Him speak to you and guide you in controlling your thoughts, your mind. I pray that you will discover how much God loves you very, very much, and how much He sees you as a beautiful creation and as never, ever a failure. Yes, you fail, I fail, and all of us fail, but we are never failures! I pray that you will allow God to show you the consequences of your actions before you start to commit them; I pray that He will give you discernment.

God bless you always. :D

Will pray for you and check back in later in the day.

Hi again. Still tired. Got up early to get one of the kids breakfast and on the bus. Praying for you to have clarity. This is important when we are in a gray area. God wants us to have peace and assurance. Romans 14 is highly relevant for you. Paul talked about being "fully persuaded" and the last verse about "if we have doubts about our behavior" its sin for us, because it means we are willing to do something wrong, even though it might not be. So, I would try to delineate if it's all wrong, or just certain things are wrong, etc. Make my boundaries and try to stick with them. "and ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall set you free." When you come to a conclusion about the truth, you'll be able to walk in peace and assurance. This is God's will, so I expect you will find clarity on this.

Don't play with fire we get burnt enough without trying to go to the edge. My heart goes out to you and my prayers are for you to see the plan that doesn't bring evil but brings a hope and a future. I wish I could give you a big hug and tell you how valuable you are especially to those who only you can reach out to with the hope that is in you.

@stwy2zeppelin, @eastcoast, and @7seeker.... Thank you all, for your encouragement, care and prayer. I mentioned in my post, that I'm without internet service this week and into next week. (On borrowed connection for a few minutes...) and that has at least worked as kind of a "cooling off" time-out for me... for God to have my attention... It feels like a child who is clinging to some toy that could be harmful to them, but they don't want to hand it over to Mom or Dad who know better. I feel like God is having to pry my fingers loose from this habit... (Even without internet service... I have managed some e-mailing. At least it was for a good reason... I wrote some short notes, that I won't be chatting or e-mailing, to some (married men) who I really should not have been messing around with... So that's a couple of my fingers "pryed loose"... more things to be straightened out... Like photos that I'll never be able to take back sending. WHAT was I thinking?!! See?... This time around is much worse than when I first came to xxxchurch almost a year ago. I didn't just relapse... I did that and went much further. I'm embarrassed to admit these things... but maybe it will help someone else to know they aren't the only ones who struggle with this addiction... Not many seem to admit to it - women and men, both. I need to admit my failure and I am now, telling you these things.

Good to hear from you. Remember you are loved, regardless. Maybe while you are reading the Bible, there will be verses that speak to you.

You're welcome, @feline99. :)

Remember that talking to God is utmost. I have discovered that praying to God to gain salvation is not that prayer is all about. Prayer is to connect us to Him, and let's us listen to Him, with our spirit and gut-feelings.

Yes, things are already done, that is true, but we can say the same thing about everything we have done! I never released a vulgar picture of myself before, but I have released pictures of my face before on a public forum. At the time, I was trying to look "hot." I feel horrible that I ever did that, but what can I do about it now? Well, I can do something about it: I can put it aside, repent, realize my mistake, and move on with God. That is the best thing we can do, and it is what works! If other problems come with it, we deal with them the way we sense that God wants us to deal with it.

You can do it! You can get through it! Remember, as @eastcoast said, that you are definitely loved, more by God than anyone else!

You need to find what it is that you really are seeking in these places. Have you been in regular contact with God his Word and remembering Christ? The next time you feel drawn to this try clossing your eyes for a moment and remembering the cross, remembering Jesus on that cross, the crown of thorns on His head, remembering the blood spilt, remembering that it was for you, and that nothing can take away what has been done for you. Keep your focus on Him and the things of the world will be put in their place. Have you been going to church regularly have you found a Bible study group or home group have you discussed your problems with your pastor/minister/priest or counsellor. Do not be ashamed we all fall short of the kingdom in our own strength it is for this reason that Christ redeems us, He is the Good Shepherd. I pray that you heart will be opened to Him, He is patiently knocking. John 11:9-10, John 16:33. Rev 3:19-20. Do not be lukewarm but trust in God and move closer to Him you need not suffer any longer, your past does not control your future.

God is Almighty

@eastcoast...Thank you... That means a lot to me. :)

@stwy2zeppelin...I'm curious - when you say you were horrified for posting a face picture on a public forum where tried to look "hot"... If it was just your face, what was the problem? I don't think looking "hot" is a sin. Also... (I'm not trying to be difficult, just thinking out loud!) ... "vulgar" pictures... I think the pictures I sent - in themselves, subject matter - were not vulgar.. God didn't make our bodies vulgar. BUT... I'm sure He doesn't approve of me sending them to strangers... cheapening His Temple. Thanks for your comments. :)

@paulg1...Thanks for commenting. :) You're right - I have let things slide... my prayer time, reading my Bible... Church attendance is zero because of circumstances that I can't change right now. In the meantime, I'm at least watching live webcasts of a particular church's services regularly. But of course, the fellowship is lacking that way, and I have no pastor... But I can't get to church right now. Soon, I'll be back to where I can attend in person regularly.

"You need to find what it is that you really are seeking in these places." Yes, I have some likely ideas of what drives me to the chats - a big one being acceptance as a woman, feeling desired sexually which has eluded me in real life. I KNOW these men are just looking for one thing online and I likely mean nothing else to them (other than a couple I talk to about all sorts of other topics...). Also, it's experiencing something (sex) even though in just a "virtual" way, that has eluded me in real life, also... Neither are good reasons, I know.... just saying what goes on in my mind, I think... Obviously, I need to work on my "real" life...

Good to hear from you lady cat, and glad we can all pull together like a family when any of us are in need.

@feline99- we have X3groups starting next month http://www.x3groups.com/
You might also find http://www.dirtygirlministries.com helpful in your battle/struggle.

You are definitely not alone and I will say a prayer for you.

@feline99.
Ever since Genesis we read how there has been deception on this world, know that what you seek you won't find in those places.
Don't need work need more rest, rest in Christ. read about Martha and Mary.
God is Almighty

@MT_of_X3... Thank you for the suggestions and your prayer. I appreciate that a lot.

@paulg1... Thanks for those reminders...

Hi, feline....I was on vacation recently as you posted...add me to the mix of those who care for you and pray His Wisdom, Grace and Love to you....no matter whether you are in sin or not, His Love endures and His Mercies are NEW every morning....He is our Good Father. :]

@becominwhole10... Thanks very much for your comments and prayer. :)

I was following Forty Days Of Purity for a very long time before posting a comment. I have had the compulsion for years. I have been nearly 70 days clean and I truly feel in my heart that God has delivered me this time. All to often we try to do this on our own and we stay in bondage to our sin because of guilt, shame and the compulsion to have that rush again just like a drug addict. We need to rely on what God can do for us, apart from God we can do nothing but we can do all things through Christ who strengthens us. I lift all of you up to God in prayer. God forgives us of our sins and pours His grace and mercy upon us.

@feline99, what I meant is that I posted a picture on a forum thread, as I watched how some members would compliment others ("Man, you're hot."), etc. It was not an "adult" forum, but in a way it was slowly becoming one (that's another story).

You're not being difficult! I understand your curiosity.